(no subject)

[fic_of_fork]

Little explanation...this is from pp. 166-167 of Tears of the Oracle by Justin Richards, one of the Benny NA's after they lost the Doctor Who license.  There's a lot they can't mention (the Doctor, Time Lords, etc), so things get referred to obliquely.  It's pretty obvious who Braxiatel is talking about, and in Empire of Glass, the Doctor makes a few hints that they knew each other quite well in childhood.  Come to think of it, Empire of Glass and Theatre of War (the novel with the Seventh Doctor and Benny where Braxiatel is introduced), are pretty much unresolved sibling rivalry among near-godlike aliens.  Their poor, sainted parents, as Mike would say.

In terms of timeline, this happens after "Gallifrey: Pandora," when Braxiatel took the Pandora fragment into his mind and partitioned it off.  That happened mere hours after he became Chancellor, and almost immediately after that happened, it came to light that he had been in contact with past and future selves for personal gain (to build the Collection), and he was stripped of his title and exiled.  (Was actually kind of a political screw job from Narvin and Darkel.)  Tears of the Oracle describes how Braxiatel won the planetoid the Collection was housed on and the first expedition to it. 

By the way, the editor to Tears of the Oracle was the same person as the script editor for "Smith and Jones," where the Doctor's brother was also mentioned.

'Have I ever told you about my family?' he [Braxiatel] asked after an age.  'I forget.'

'Never'

He nodded.  'Not much to tell.  The problem is, I suppose, when people come to expect things of you that you can't deliver.  If you never deliver, they have no expectations.  But being right most of the time, having the answer most of the time, makes it so much worse when you're wrong, when you don't know.  When you just can't help.'  He rubbed his index finger over his bottom lip.  'It's to do with respect and it's to do with friendship.  you know, when I was young, I never wanted to conform.  I wanted to get out, to do and see things.  There just seemed to be so much out there that we were denied.  I couldn't cope with that.'  He smiled thinly.  'I guess it's in the blood.  That's why I collect things now, amass them, hoard them.  I just need them to be there for me.  But also for others.  For sharing.  For enjoying.  For wonder.'

He reached out again and scooped up a few of the pebbles, rolling them together in his fist.  'So I had an idea.  It was obvious we'd have to get involved in some things, some time.  So I made sure when that happened it was me they came to first.  made sure that I conformed so much to their way of thinking that when they had to break the mould, they asked me to do it.  That needed patience, but that's something I've learnt.  So I conformed, excelled even.  I graduated with a fistful of firsts.'  He shook his fist in the air, holding it up for the Oracle to see.  'But in fact, they were worth nothing to me.'  He opened his hand and the pebbles fell to the ground.  'I instigated research projects, made clever proposals, agreed with arrogant idiots.  All in line with what was expected, what was encouraged.  I pushed the envelope, but I never tried to break through it.  Not then.  Not till later.'

He shifted slightly on the cold ground.  'Now there was another approach I could have taken.  More drastic, less patient.  By the time my brother was doing his exams, I was already an unofficial ambassador, already off on missions the like of which nobody had ever dreamt of before.  Making a great show of martyring myself to the necessity while actually relishing every moment of it.  making sure everyone else felt sorry for me that I had to do these terrible things rather than sit at home, cosy and safe for an eternity.'

He gave a short, half-laugh.  'I never realized how jealous he was.  Or how impatient.  At first he followed my example, I think.  He respected me, which I suppose was a good part of the problem.  He wanted, I think, to be me.  And the resentment came later when he realized there couldn't be two of us, that we are different.  So he had a different plan.'

Braxiatel laughed again as he remembered.  The sound echoed round the dark temple ruins, but when it came back it sounded strangely hollow.  'First class degrees,' he said, shaking his head.  'I thought that was clever.  But he made sure he scraped through with the barest minimum on the last permitted attempt.  And they knew it.  Forget getting a first, anyone can do that with a little diligence and application.  But what he did took genius.  And then he was off.  Having thumbed his nose at them academically, he did it physically.  By leaving.  He had seen what I was up to. By then I was out, I'd made the case for having someone always out there in the universe, and won the ensuing arguments.  I was the one.  And there was no way they'd let anyone else do it.  So he didn't ask, he just went.'  Braxiatel laughed again, but it was a quieter, more melancholy sound.  'I can do that too, try to stop me if you're so clever.  That's what he thought.'

There was silence for awhile again.  'I miss him, I suppose that's what I'm saying,' Braxiatel said at last.  'But he's out there, somewhere.  He'll always be out there.  That's family for you.  Real family.'